You Are The Everything
by Grevola
Summary: Introspective fic. Wufei seeks comfort from his wife's memory before the final battle for peace.


You Are The Everything  
  
or Finding the Calm Before the Storm  
  
Sometimes I feel like I can't even sing (say, say, the light)  
  
I'm very scared for this world  
  
I'm very scared for me  
  
Eviscerate your memory  
  
Here's a scene  
  
You're in the back seat laying down  
  
The windows wrap around  
  
To sound of the travel and the engine  
  
All you hear is time stand still in travel  
  
and feel such peace and absolute  
  
The stillness still that doesn't end  
  
But slowly drifts into sleep  
  
The stars are the greatest thing you've ever seen  
  
And they're there for you  
  
For you alone you are the everything  
  
Wufei sat on the shoulder of Nataku, his gundam, meditating. He wondered how Meiran felt, after she died. Did she still think of him as unworthy, or had she finally found rest? Sometimes when he was fully centered he felt like she was with him, like he could almost see her.  
  
He needed her that night, sitting on the shoulder of Nataku in the Peacemillion, knowing that within the next few hours there would be a battle that would decide the fate of every human being in Earth and Space. The more he thought about all that he had seen, all that he had faced, and all that the world dealt with, the more depressed he became.  
  
The humming of the engines and the gentle vista of the stars out of the window calmed him, helping him to regain his center. This was one of those nights, when all was quiet save the gentle hum of an engine traveling. A night when time stood still and he felt completely alone, but entirely in touch with his world.  
  
I think about this world a lot and I cry  
  
And I've seen the films and the eyes  
  
But I'm in this kitchen  
  
Everything is beautiful  
  
And she is so beautiful  
  
She is so young and old  
  
I look at her and I see the beauty  
  
Of the light of music  
  
The voices talking somewhere in the house  
  
Late spring and you're drifting off to sleep  
  
With your teeth in your mouth  
  
You are here with me  
  
You are here with me  
  
You have been here and you are everything  
  
Silent tears made tracks down his face, reminding him that he still felt guilt and sorrow. His world had been made up of cold anger and revenge for so long... and then he had begun his quest for justice. He needed to know that what he was doing would help the world, not hurt it.  
  
Slowly he rose, unmindful of his tears. It was too late for anyone to be up and about on the ship, and he made a solitary track to the kitchen. There was only one light on in the galley as he set about making some tea. The calm of his meditation still engulfed him, but he no longer felt like the only being in the universe.  
  
He pulled a small picture from his memory, concentrating on the way the light hit her dark hair, the way her eyes had sparkled as she spoke to him. He sipped his tea and thought about Meiran, wanting her to be there with him, and suddenly it was like she was. He felt as though she were with him, supporting him and scolding him for crying. He smiled slightly. She would always be with him, and if things didn't go well in the morning... he would just be that much closer to seeing her.  
  
  
  
Sometimes I feel like I can't even sing (say, say, the light)  
  
I'm very scared for this world  
  
I'm very scared for me  
  
Eviscerate your memory  
  
Here's a scene  
  
You're in the back seat laying down  
  
The windows wrap around  
  
To sound of the travel and the engine  
  
All you hear is time stand still in travel  
  
and feel such peace and absolute  
  
The stillness still that doesn't end  
  
But slowly drifts into sleep  
  
The stars are the greatest thing you've ever seen  
  
And they're there for you  
  
For you alone you are the everything  
  
Wufei returned to his room after finishing his tea, moving quietly to his bed and settling in for the night. In the next room he could hear both Duo and Heero's low voices, the words muffled by the distance and the wall.  
  
He smiled, they were looking for reassurance in each other, just as he had been looking for it in Meiran. He was still frightened, but it seemed as though the fear was coming to him from a long way off, as muffled as the voices through the wall.  
  
His calm stillness and no longer painful thoughts slowly eased into a deep, restful sleep. The last thing he saw before he let himself fall into a dreamless slumber were the serene stars out of the window. They reminded him that whatever happened, the world would indeed go on.  
  
  
  
Author's Notes: My first attempt at a GW introspective fic, and I choose Wufei, who's character I am not terribly familiar with. Well is it too OOC? I don't think so, but then I'm all ways looking for the depth in people. Tell me what you think: mywebjunk@webinbox.com  
  
Second Note: I originally wrote this before I had read the Episode Zero, so I understand that there are some inaccuracies. Either think of it as an AU, or nag my muse to put out a version more true to the real story. Thanks! ~G'Vola  
  
Shameless Plug: If you liked this you might like my second introspective fic, Laying The Soldier To Rest. It chronicles Heero's fight for humanity after the wars. 


End file.
